A Tourist's Guide to the Outlands

Many visitors arrive in Sigil with a list of portals to find and a firm intention to see everything. A few days later, they have learned three new ways to lose their coin and are still arguing with someone about directions. There is much to recommend the City of Doors. There is also much to recommend leaving it occasionally.

Beyond the Cage, the Outlands offers busy markets, longship builders, philosophical debates, and inns where a quiet room is an achievement worth paying for. Around the Spire stand sixteen gate-towns, each gathered about a passage to another Outer Plane. They are destinations in their own right, with local pleasures that deserve more attention than a hurried stop on the way somewhere else.

Consider this an itinerary for the curious, the thirsty, and the cutter who leaves space in a pack for a souvenir. D20Threads’ Gate-towns of the Outlands T-shirts offer a reminder of each stop, whether your journey takes you to a friendly market or somewhere you are chiefly pleased to have left.

One caution before setting out: a gate-town can become too much like the plane beyond its gate. When its people’s beliefs and conduct tip far enough in that direction, the whole place can slide across. Ask after local affairs before booking a long stay. A change of address is considerably more troublesome when it includes a change of plane.

Good company, lively arguments, and room to wander

For a welcoming introduction, begin with Excelsior, the gate-town to Mount Celestia. Its kindly population makes a pleasant change from the Sigil tout who charged you to point at a doorway. There is something reassuring about arriving where helping a stranger is taken seriously.

Spend some time at the Forum, where paladins discuss law, goodness, and what ought to be done about the multiverse’s shortcomings. These are earnest conversations, although agreement on the value of virtue does not guarantee agreement on its finer points. A visitor can learn a great deal simply by listening. If you contribute, expect your casual observation to receive more attention than it did over breakfast.

In Tradegate, conversation is more likely to concern what you have, what you need, and whether either can be exchanged at a favorable rate. This is the gate-town to Bytopia, and its commerce gives a traveler ample reason to linger. Set aside time to look around before committing all your jink—your spending money—to the first persuasive offer.

Keep the Dragon’s Sun in mind as a local stop, and make your arrangements for onward passage carefully. The Master Trader associated with the gate to Bytopia is a bariaur, a being with a humanoid torso and a ramlike lower body. In Tradegate, “ask the merchant” can turn out to be more literal travel advice than you expected.

After so much bargaining, Ecstasy provides an excellent excuse to slow down. Its gate leads to Elysium, and the town’s many plinths support residents occupied with contemplation. Leave them to it. Someone sitting perfectly still above the street may be having a far more eventful afternoon than you are.

The Philosopher’s Court offers a more conversational approach to the important questions. For refreshment, remember the Revelhome and its veiled proprietor, Madame Millanni. A drink after a debate is a sound arrangement, provided you do not bring every unresolved argument into the tavern. Ecstasy rewards a visitor willing to enjoy the pause between journeys.

Faunel asks you to look a little more closely. Its ruined buildings and encroaching vegetation suggest abandonment, but the town is very much inhabited. Among its residents are animal petitioners: souls whose lives have brought them to an animal form. Treat an encounter accordingly. What looks like wildlife may be a neighbor going about their business.

At the pool that serves as the gate to the Beastlands stands Wrath, a great stone guardian who asks travelers their purpose. Give him an honest answer. The setting may encourage a leisurely wander, but the gateway has someone attending to it, and ignoring that someone is poor manners as well as poor planning.

Music, longships, and uncertain directions

If your pack still has room after Tradegate, leave some of it for a tourist T-shirt from D20Threads. A useful souvenir should remind you where you went without obliging you to explain why a stone guardian objected to your luggage.

In Sylvania, the sound of celebration is part of the town’s welcome. Its gate leads to Arborea, and the local enthusiasm for music and revelry makes this a natural stop for travelers who have been behaving sensibly for too long. Remember the Dipping Dragon Inn when making your plans. Also remember that an early departure becomes harder to defend with every pleasant evening you spend here.

The mood changes in Glorium, where longhouses and shipbuilding stand beside a great fjord. The Freki twins are names worth knowing if fine longships interest you. Flatnose Grim, the town’s chieftain, is another name you will hear, especially where strength and contests are concerned. Be courteous; local pride deserves more respect than an offhand joke from a passing visitor.

There are no inns or taverns to fall back on here, so consider your lodging arrangements before arrival. The Watergate, a maelstrom near the fjord’s mouth, leads to Ysgard and is large enough for ships. Another route follows Yggdrasil through a cavern. These are impressive opportunities for onward travel, but watching a vessel approach the Watergate from shore is quite enough excitement for a first visit.

Then there is Xaos, the gate-town to Limbo, where the place itself refuses to cooperate with a tidy itinerary. The Nameless Sage of the Marketplace is a local worth asking after. Whether your questions concern the town or the larger uncertainties of existence, you have arrived somewhere suited to both.

Allow time for confusion. Xaos is constantly changing, and a traveler who insists that every street behave as a street behaved yesterday is likely to spend the visit disappointed. Keep your plans flexible and your sense of curiosity intact. You came to see something different; here, that wish can be answered repeatedly.

A less restful stretch of the journey

At Bedlam, shelter from the wind matters. Built on the slopes of Maurash, the town leads to Pandemonium, whose influence reaches well beyond the gate. Midtown contains many of the inns and taverns, giving a tired traveler a sensible district to investigate before approaching the noisier business below.

The Eye and Dagger is particularly worth remembering: silence magic protects parts of the establishment from the howling wind. Friendly service is a separate question. Weylund’s Inn offers another name for your lodging list. After a day in Bedlam, a quiet conversation can feel like a luxury more remarkable than any view from a tower.

Plague-Mort has a gate to the Abyss and a ruler, Arch-Lector Byrri Yarmoril, whose Hounds enforce his demands. Learn who holds power before assuming that a commercial welcome means you have found a comfortable place to settle. Trade with the Abyss brings visitors through the town, and Broken Reach beyond the gate helps explain the traffic.

The Hounds make the Arch-Lector’s authority a practical concern for visitors as well as residents. Before buying, selling, or arranging passage, learn what demands will accompany the transaction. The sum you agreed with a merchant may be only the beginning of your expenses. Plague-Mort gives an observant traveler plenty to think about without requiring a journey into the Abyss itself.

In Curst, the most useful question is how you will leave. The gate leads to Carceri, and the town’s razorvine defenses and watchful walls make arrival a poor moment to discover that you neglected the return journey.

The Quartered Man and its proprietor, Abascis the Sweaty, are names to keep in mind if you need a local drinking stop. Around you, exiles nurse grievances and plans for revenge. Listen with care. Another person’s torment can become a very long story, and sympathy should not casually become a promise to settle their score. You may have entered Curst for a short visit; make sure everyone concerned understands that.

Hopeless announces itself with an entrance carved as a screaming face. Within, a single road spirals down toward the gate to the Gray Waste. Under High Cardinal Thingol, this is a town whose architecture and atmosphere give a visitor ample reason for a brief, deliberate stay.

Respect the restrictions on bright and contrasting colors. The residents’ sensitivity is a local reality, not an invitation to arrive wearing your most cheerful holiday outfit. Save the Hopeless souvenir T-shirt for your return home, where the pleasure of having completed that particular detour may be easier to appreciate.

Baths, bargains, and the local rules

The name Torch suits a town built amid volcanic slopes. Its gate leads to Gehenna, while its local affairs offer their own opportunities to lose your footing. The Festhall of the Falling Coins serves as neutral meeting ground for competing thieves’ guilds—a distinctive institution, and one whose name a visitor should remember.

Neutral ground permits rivals to meet; it does not relieve you of the need to watch your belongings. A traveler interested in the town can learn something from who is willing to share a room, without volunteering to join the conversation. Resist the urge to demonstrate how much coin you brought for the journey.

Ribcage offers a more tempting pause. In the Vale of the Spine, this oppressive town stands at the gate to Baator, the Nine Hells. Yet on its outskirts is the Gymnasium of Steam, Shandrala’s bathhouse, supplied by volcanic springs.

After the road, a bath is an appealing item on the itinerary. Make room for it without forgetting where you are. Ribcage’s comforts exist alongside its severe atmosphere, and a relaxing stop does not make every local arrangement worthy of your trust. Enjoy the respite; keep your judgment with you when you leave it.

In Rigus, military life gives the town its character. The passage to Acheron lies deep below the fortress: from the Crown, a long stair leads down to the Lion’s Gate. Here, the way onward is a descent through a defended place rather than a doorway encountered while browsing shops.

Expect the visit to demand attention to your surroundings. A great military encampment has concerns of its own, and a tourist’s desire to have a look is unlikely to be foremost among them. Know where you intend to go before setting off to find the gate.

Automata, the gate-town to Mechanus, brings a different discipline. Its orderly streets and Council of Order encourage the impression that everything has its proper place. The opposing Council of Anarchy suggests that appearances deserve a second look.

A traveler who has survived dungeons and dragons can still be caught out by an unfamiliar local rule. Learn those rules before allowing confidence to carry you past them. For lodging, the Divine Machine and its halfling proprietor Tourlac give you a useful starting point. An inn is a welcome thing when the day’s chief discovery has been how much there is to understand before proceeding. D20Threads’ Automata T-shirt makes a welcome souvenir when you have finished attending to the less enjoyable business of the visit.

Finally, Fortitude offers parks, orchards, and orderly boulevards within an oval wall that earns the town its nickname, the Egg. Its gate leads to Arcadia. Spend time enjoying the greenery before deciding that you understand the entire place.

The Confessional is the landmark that rewards closer attention: an arena where people admit their faults and the gathered crowd determines punishment. A visitor accustomed to applauding local customs should listen carefully before joining in. Fortitude’s concern for proper conduct extends well beyond keeping the streets attractive.

Pack light; come home with stories

That is the pleasure of touring the Outlands. A journey can take you from a debate in Excelsior to the shipbuilders of Glorium, from a drink in Ecstasy to a bath outside Ribcage. The markets, inns, guardians, and local customs give each town a character worth knowing before you step through its gate.

Choose your stops with curiosity, arrange your way home with care, and leave room for something you will be pleased to unpack. At D20Threads, the Gate-towns of the Outlands collection has a tourist T-shirt for each of the sixteen destinations. Bring home the one that recalls your favorite stop—or the one that reminds you why next year’s holiday ought to be quieter.